You Just Gotta Go With The Flow!

I know it's been a while since my last post. I can't recall anything really "blog-worthy" happening these past few weeks, but I do have some note worthy stuff now!


And I do apologize in advance, I really suck at taking pictures of these cool adventures I go on. (And you'd think that since I have such a sweet, expensive camera, AND an iPhone, I'd do better). I promise, for blogging purposes (and of course, to keep as good memories) I will do better!


Anyways, this weekend was fantastic! Jake's dad, Roger, and his step-mom, Anita, took us on a little rafting trip. Those two are total "river rats" as Jake would say. Our rafting trip took up most of the day, and wasn't as intense or scary as I had anticipated. I was expecting some intense rapids or to possibly be thrown from the raft, but Roger and Anita definitely wanted to start me out on something I could handle, but would still give me a taste of what rafting really is. And if you know me, I never say no to adventurous activities! 


They took super good care of me, and made sure I understood all of the commands, and I picked it up pretty well! I wasn't scared at all, got a few butterflies at the intense rapids in the end, but that just left me wanting more. Roger told me those rapids were probably a "class 3". If that's the case, I could totally see me handling a class 4, or maybe even a 5. But we'll save that for after the baby makes it's arrival.






Speaking of baby, my insurance/Medicaid coverage has FINALLY been straightened out, and I can finally get some prenatal care! I am a little overdue for it (about 5-6 weeks overdue for me first appointment), but it's better late than never. According to what Planned Parenthood had estimated me at, I started my Second Trimester yesterday. That would put me at 13 weeks. So, we are already 1/3 of the way there! I feel like it's already flying by! According to an app I have on my phone, about this time most of the common pregnancy symptoms usually subside (ie: morning sickness), which I haven't had at all, but my energy is back and it's so nice to not feel like I need to take several naps throughout the day just to function. I've started to slowly ease my way back into the gym (nothing strenuous, just trying to be all around more physical if anything!) which isn't an issue for me, seeing how much of a "gym rat" I was prior to conceiving, my body can handle it without going into shock. I just have to make sure my heart rate doesn't spike too high, and doesn't stay too high for a long period of time. So I just make sure I take plenty of breaks between sets and drink plenty of water. 


The most important task I have this week is finding me a doctor, which thanks for Facebook friends, I think I may have found one! Saves me a lot of time and stress, and these doctors also deliver at St. Luke's in downtown Boise, which is exactly where I want to have the baby, so it's perfect! I need to get in this week since I'm so behind on my prenatal care. I've been doing everything I can on my own thus far (prenatal vitamins, avoiding certain foods, watching my diet, etc.) so I think there won't be much change. Unfortunately, Jake is out of town all week with his band recording their second album (which I think is SUPER awesome! Not just because I'm his "baby mama", but how many people can say they've recorded two albums, let alone ONE!), so if I do happen to get in this week, he won't be there. Which I know he wants to SO bad, but if I can get in this week I need to take it. Medical care for the baby is the most important thing right now. I'll just give him super detailed updates! :)


So, he leaves today (Sunday), and will be back next Sunday. 8 whole days. It's really not going to be a bad thing though. As much as I love spending everyday with him, we both need our own time to do things we want to do, ESPECIALLY before the baby comes. He needs his "guy time", and I need my "girl time". But the nice thing about this week is I will be working a lot, and I'll also have a lot of time to catch up on things ( like CHORES) and will more than likely do some more "nesting". I've been trying to teach myself to crochet, but its really hard to watch YouTube videos on my iPhone screen and really see the stitches. Luckily, my mom is a crocheting-sewing super woman, so I'll be spending a lot of time at my parents house learning the trade. I really do wish I knew the sex of the baby already because I want to start making curtains and bedding for the nursery, but we're only a few weeks away from knowing, so I just have to be a little more patient, but this will also give me ideas on how to decorate the nursery for a boy. I have my "girl" nursery all planned out, but need a boy's room idea just in case.




Ok, enough talk. I'll post more as more things happen, and YES, I will post pictures too!


xoxo

Surprises, Amazing Music and the Most Amazing Guy in the World

This is no understatement. I seriously am the luckiest girl in the world. No competition. I have the most amazing boyfriend in the entire world. And I am going to marry him (this was pretty much already decided before I got pregnant, so it's not a surprise to us.) But just to give you and example of how amazing Jake really is...I'll let you in on some news.

One of my favorite....FAVORITE artists of ALL time is Dallas Green. Currently, he is on tour with his folk/acoustic group, City and Colour, and generally they do very small US tours, IF they do them at all. When they do, they generally will only play in larger cities: (IE: Chicago, LA, Seattle, etc.). But mostly play in Canada (where they're from) and Europe.

Anyways, on their current tour, the closest city they are playing in is Denver. Yesterday while I was at work, I wasn't having a totally awesome day (it wasn't bad either, just sort of "blah") and I got a text from Jake. Here's how that texting conversation went...

Needless to say, I was speechless. I absolutely LOVE Dallas Green/City and Colour. This man's voice is seriously the most beautiful thing to ever fill my ear holes (AND he's not that bad looking either! :)

Jake likes his music just as much, if not more so than I do. He's the one who got me into Alexisonfire in high school (Dallas Green's post-harcore band that still tours occasionally), and then introduced me to City and Colour earlier this year.

I'm so excited and can't WAIT to go!!

Dallas Green. He's such a beautiful man!

For those of you who haven't heard City and Colour's music, here are a few YouTube clips for you to experience the awesomeness of Dallas Green's voice. Prepare for goosebumps!

"Hello, I'm in Delaware" (from the "Sometime's" album)

"Constant Knot" (from the "Bring Me Your Love" album)

"We Found Each Other in The Dark" (from the "Little Hell" album)

"Fragile Bird" (from the "Little Hell" album)



"Casey's Song" (from the "Sometimes" album)

Enjoy!

xoxo

Simple Thoughts from a Complex Mind...

I've been up since 3:45am this morning (because our morning manager is stuck in Denver, so my boss ever so kindly gave me the option to open the gym this morning. Lucky for me, Jake wakes up at 3:30 for work, so he made sure I got my lazy butt out of bed.) but the nice thing about working so early, is the fact that I get off work at 12:30pm and still have a lot of my day left. And I also will actually get to spend some time with Jake as well! So it's a WIN WIN situation, minus that fact that I am already super tired, but I can nap when I get home.

OH! Before I forget, I posted about my "loaded" burgers I was thinking of making last night. We ended up not having a BBQ with friends over, we just cooked the two of us. But I made some AWESOME burgers. Here's the recipe:

(this makes 2 burger patties)

1 tbsp minced garlic

1 tbsp butter

3/4 c diced bacon (I diced it before I fried it up)

1/4 c Cilantro

1 Jalapeno (minced)

1/2-1 tbsp Worcestershire Sauce

2 tsp Paprika

1/2lb - 1 lbs ground beef (depending on how big you want your burger)

Salt & Pepper (as desired)

Melt butter in a skillet and saute garlic and jalapeno. Once garlic starts browning, add in bacon and fry until thoroughly cooked. Add all remaining ingredients in a medium sized bowl and mix well (I used my hands to make sure everything was mixed in the ground beef pretty evenly. Form into preferred sized patties and grill or pan fry to desired doneness. (You can also add grated cheese to the meat to give it an already cheesy taste).

These burgers were fantastic! Definitely going to make them again for Jake and his friends :)

Anyways, this post may be a little long. When I get up early, I end up with a lot of thoughts in my head for some odd reason.

I calculated it this morning, and I am 2 weeks away from the second trimester of my pregnancy. Which seems crazy because I feel like I haven't been pregnant for that long, but it also feels like it's flying by. It's insane to think in about 28 ish weeks, I am going to be a mother. WOW. Talk about a humbling thought. I have always, ALWAYS wanted to be a mom, so I was no where near disappointed when we found out. At the same time, I was surprised because for a while I thought I couldn't get pregnant. Many of you know that I was married before, and 6 months before Tyler passed away, we started trying for children, but nothing worked. I did get a little disheartened. And doctors told me when he was in the hospital, that he was more than likely sterile, but I couldn't help but feel a little guilty of us not being able to conceive either. Everything happens for a reason, and there was a reason it didn't happen. And there's a reason why it's happening now, with Jake, and I wouldn't change it for the world.

Speaking of, Friday will be one year since Tyler's passing. And this last year has definitely been a whirlwind. I am definitely not where I thought I would be,  but who ever is? You can't plan out your life detail after little detail, because sometimes there is so much more in store for you. I learned that the hard way. But I've learned to also never take anything for granted. A lot of things have changed since then too. I've changed a lot. And sadly, there are a lot of people who don't like the changes I've made. Personally, if you can't be happy with the fact that I am not still "moping" over my loss, and the fact that I am genuinely happy for the first time in a while, then you have no business being a part of my life. I've had to cut a lot of people out of my life because when I would do something they didn't approve of, they would tell me. They always said "I'm not judging you, I'm disappointed in you". The fact that you have a negative opinion about anything regarding myself is in fact a judgement. I'm sorry if I'm not the person you thought I was, but things are not the way I thought they were going to be. I'm living life with the tools that I've been given, and frankly, I don't give a damn what you think. I'm sorry if that is harsh, but it's the God honest truth. I love my life. I have zero regrets about anything because I wouldn't be the strong, independent woman I am today if I hadn't made mistakes or taken risks. Do I miss Tyler? Yes, absolutely. But I have accepted the fact that he is gone and that I have to move on. If there's one thing that I learned most importantly from this experience, it's that life is short. I can't sit around being depressed all the time about something that is/was 100% out of my control. I haven't had ONE "What if?" thought, because that's a waste of time. There was nothing I could do and it was his time to go. I'm sorry some people still have a hard time grasping that concept, but that is life. It's short. We live, we die, the end. Death is just as natural as birth. Yes, it is a sad thing when someone so young has their life cut short, but it's supposed to be that way, otherwise it wouldn't have happened. I'm not heartless, I'm realistic. It's helped me cope. It's helped me understand. It's helped me pick myself up from my lowest low, and start climbing to the top again.

Nothing in this life is guaranteed. I may not be the religious girl I once was, but I feel more spiritual than anything. I feel more in tune with myself now more than ever. I feel calm, at ease, and at peace with the world. What I went through was no easy task, no walk in the park, but I was meant to go through that for a reason. I firmly believe that EVERYTHING happens for a reason. Was I meant to learn something? Was I meant to grow from this? Was I meant to inspire someone, be their rock? I have no idea the reasoning, but I am grateful at who I have become because of this. I didn't let it beat me, I didn't let it take over my life and tear me down. I embraced it, accepted it, and carried on. Which is so much easier said than done. But I hope that throughout this, I was able to be a support for someone. An inspiration I guess.

And the beautiful thing about this, I don't get sad, upset, or angry easily anymore. Life's too short to fuss, and get worked up over silly things that won't matter tomorrow.

Ok, done with my rant. Hope everyone has a fabulous day!

I better love cooking, since my maiden name is "Cook".

I'm kind of a self-declared cooking phenom. (That sounded really cocky, but I'm not going to lie, I really am a great cook.) I love to experiment with different flavors and spices and whatever I can get my hands on. I'm almost always, ALWAYS researching new recipes to try out. I typically don't like to repeat meals very often, thus my love for trying new things!

I'v been looking up recipes all day because I think I'm going to throw together a last minute BBQ tonight with me, Jake, Ryan, Mike and Chris. Mike and Chris come over routinely for dinner (since we all have jobs and don't get to see each other all that often. Ryan is a new addition to our little tradition, which I think we are trying to do this weekly, if not bi-weekly now.

Anywho, I'm making burgers tonight. Not just plain burgers though, I'm loading them up with tons of flavor and gooooood stuff. Cilantro, Jalapenos, Bacon and probably some garlic (mixed in the patties themselves!). (My mouth is watering as I'm putting everything together in my head! Ahhh!)

I'll have to let you all know how delicious they turn out. I need to come up with some side dishes too. And I'm thinking I need to start posting some of my favorite recipes as well!!

I'll do that later in the week. I've got to get them together first!

These are a few of my favorite things...

I was inspired by my dear friend, Taylor's blog (It's a Sunday Afternoon...follow it! It's adorable just like her!) to post about my favorite things. Which tend to change routinely because of certain hormones taking over (I know, just another excuse, but really.) And my taste in things change so much it's ridiculous. But here are a few of my favorite things:

Favorite Website:

Dear Photograph

I am in LOVE with the creativity put into this website. I can sit and look at the pictures for hours, laughing, crying, contemplating, and reminicing memories from my childhood. People will post pictures of pictures (as seen above) with captions to go along with them. It makes me want to go though my mom's photo albums and take a few of my own to submit.

Favorite Online Store:

ModCloth.com

This shop has the CUTEST mod/vintage style clothing, accessories, and even household items. I can sit and surf all day. I haven't purchased anything yet just because some of the stuff is a little pricy, and because I generally want to buy everything! But it gives me some super cute ideas on things I can make or possibly thrift!

Favorite Shoes:

Soda brand "Bedside" slip ons

I bought these shoes a few days ago (actually, got them for free at 1318 in the mall. That store always has "Buy One, Get One Free" deals, so these were my free pair. They are SO SO SO comfortable, and are good on my feet. Granted, I wouldn't want to take long walks in them because of how thin they are and how little support there is, but they're good for work!

Favorite Music:

This one was tough. I have such a wide variety of genres that I like, but lately I've been into more acoustic, mellow, easy listening indie type stuff. My favorite album right now is "The Con" by Teagan and Sara.

I love the style, and mellowness of it. And their voices! I would love to see them live, that's for sure.

Favorite Drink:

A friend was telling me the other day, that Dutch Bro's Coffee makes red bull smoothies. Now, I know with me being pregnant, caffiene is not the best thing for me to consume, but I drink these sparingly, or usually go for just a regular smoothie. But they are delicious!

I've only had strawberry so far, but they can make these in any flavor you can possibly imagine. And you can make it sugar free as well. So delicious expecially on these super hot summer days!

What are some of your favorite things? :)

Oh Pregnancy, such a blissful, yet exhausting journey.

So far, my pregnancy has been pretty "textbook" I guess you can say. (Sorry if this get's a little personal, but it's natural, so bear with me). I am only 11 weeks along now, so it's still super early and there is plenty of time for other symptoms to show up, but I've got the standard one's down perfectly, all with the exception of morning sickness. I have had NONE whatsoever and it has been WONDERFUL. But I've had many others to make up for that!

Extreme Fatigue - and by extreme, I mean wanting to literally sleep for days. And to the point where I've considered calling in sick at work just so I can nap longer. I've gotten some of my energy back luckily, but I still don't ever feel quite refreshed after a good night's sleep. I asked my mom when the exhaustion goes away. She said when the kids move out. Thanks for the reassurance, Mom.

Missed Periods - This is kind of a no brainer, and I have never been happier to miss that little monthly annoyance. I don't have to worry about buying "feminine products" anymore (well, at least for the next 7 months or so). Or worrying about staining clothes. Such a relief to say the least. It's nice to have a break since I haven't had one in oh, 9 years!

Sore/Tender Breasts - Oh yeah, this has been a big one. (Sorry guys, I know you really don't want to hear this, but I have no shame, so I don't care. Just skip this part if you will...) The first few weeks were AWFUL. It hurt to basically WEAR clothing. All of my bras felt like they were squishing the poor things and it felt as if someone has tenderized them with a meat hammer. And oddly enough, the only comfortable position I could sleep was face down with my arms above my head. Gravity was my worst enemy to say the least. It's gotten a lot better, but still tender as the milk ducts are developing. Oh, and yes, they grow. That's the most painful part.

Cravings - Oh my goodness. Cravings galore. I haven't craved things that are physically harmful to me (IE: dirt, laundry detergent, paint [I have heard of these instances!]) But I almost have a new craving everyday. Everyone knows before that I found out I was pregnant, I was training for a figure competition, so I was really limiting my calorie intake (probably sticking around 1,100/day or so) and working out about 2 1/2 hours/day. I think the seamonkey is trying to make up for all the crap food I hadn't eaten in so long, because now all I want is unhealthy, greasy, cheesy, carb-loaded food. Which is very unfortunate because I WANT to eat healthy. For the first few weeks I tried, and anytime I'd try to make a salad, I'd feel sick to my stomach, so it didn't work out so well. For the first few weeks it's been tomatoes and salt and vinegar chips. But lately it's pretty much just been fluids. I've been almost constantly thirsty (which sucks because I already pee all the dang time anyways!). But whatever I'd drinking has to be ICE COLD. Ice cold water, milk, orange juice, anything. Just as long as it was cold enough to give me a brain freeze.

Today has been my Orange Juice day. I've finished the mostly empty bottle and another one already. The full one is almost gone now as I am writing this.

I do get random cravings. Sweet potato fries with honey mustard dipipng sauce (specifically from The Curb), anything covered in cheese, sour cream, potatoes and the list goes on and on. Luckily, I have a super awesome boyfriend who will text me before I get off work, ask me what I'm craving, and try to fit that in to dinner somehow. Or if he has the day off, he'll want to come see me at work, and bring me a snack or whatever I'm craving at the time. (He's so good like that :)

Morning Sickness - Like I stated earlier, I haven't had any morning sickness. The day before I found out I was pregnant was the closest to "throwing up" as I had gotten. But I had a one hour workout with my trainer, a 90 minute high-intensity cardio session before that, and sat in the steam room for about 15 minutes. I felt super nauseated (probably because I hadn't eaten a good balanced meal yet, only a protein shake). I've felt a little quesy at times, but if I eat something, generally I'm ok afterwards.

A few other minor symptoms...

Dizzy Spells - At times, the room starts spinning. No big deal.

Shortness of Breath - Doesn't take much. Just a trip up the stairs. I'm in much better shape than that!

Forgetfulness - ITS TRUE. Due to a lack of bloodflow to the brain because your body is focused on other things.

Bloating - I always feel bloated! But that's because your digestion slows way doesn and food takes longer to process when pregnant.

Ok, that's about it now. I'll leave you with my latest belly pic!

10 weeks

And by the way...

I could be up to a month further along than we think. The month of April had a total of 3 periods (all super sketchy and light), but I didn't think anything of it, just thought it was a birth control fluke (which I had never had). I should hear back from Medicaid soon and be able to get an exact due date when I see my doctor. But as of right now, it's February 5th, 2012.

Night Out for the Parents to be!

Last night, Jake and I went out for my best friend, Katie's birthday! We went downtown and ate a "Fork", which is a pretty ritzy restaurant, and the prices of the entrees proved that! Sadly, the portions were much too small, so afterwards we stopped by Taco Bell for a midnight snack :)

Of course, since I am currently carrying our child, I wasn't drinking, I ended up being DD, which was a lot of fun. I love my friends, and I love that Jake gets along with my friends and loves them! Makes things so much smoother with our "groups". And of course, I love his friends!

Here's some pictures from last night!

Jake and I at Fatty's Bar

Jake and I at "Fork"

We sure clean up good!

Me and birthday girl, Katie!

Bought her a Watermelon Jolly Rancher as a birthday shot!

Jake's favorite picture of us <3

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